Woof!

I feel like I flunked at the idiosyncrasy thing because I didn't come up with different stuff than I'd usually say. Now that I'm following it around on other's blogs & actually learning fun little things about people I think I should have thought about it longer. Maybe I'd have come up with something new. I'm sure there are a million things I could have shared, but even when trying really hard the same old stuff is what came to mind. I guess I'm pretty predictable that way.
Why am I even thinking about this? Oh, because I've had a song in my head for days & want to post the video for it in this entry. And whoever it is that reads this can roll their eyes just a little when they hear the sound of BNL coming from their computer speakers. Yeah, we've covered the fact that I adore them. I'm a loyal fan. Uh-huh, we already know. I'm loving this song right now though. It's stuck in my head & I can't stop singing it.

[Testing 123 BNL]

I'm predictable. I'm consistent. I'm loyal. Sounds like I'm describing a puppy.
Woof!

I'm it?!

Hey Becky!

Funny, after coming home tonight from seeing you for the first time in a year I read your blog, and you've tagged me! I'd have poked you if I'd read it before heading out for our adventures today.

Well the thing going around is to list 5 idiosyncrasies about yourself, and then pass it on.
Here I go with mine...

1. If I even think I may have just seen a bug of any kind anywhere near me I get itchy. Really itchy. All over. Ick. I don't do bugs.

2. My toothbrush does not live in the bathroom. Not even in a drawer. If we had a linen closet in there I'd consider it. The thought of poop-particles on something that enters my mouth icks me right out. (It lives on the dresser in my bedroom closet, and has a cover to prevent dust or anything else touching it.)

3. Speaking of entering my mouth I have food texture issues. I love the taste of beef, poultry & pork chops, but if there are any chewies present I won't touch it. If it's shredded/cut up and in something I am much more brave about it. (Like chicken enchiladas, deli-sliced turkey sandwiches or ground beef in pasta sauce.) I like my bacon crisp, don't eat ham & would prefer to stay far far away from anything still attached to a bone. (Meat is generally attached to the bones by chewies...) Gag.

4. I'm a detail person & a visual person. With a horrible short-term memory. I won't remember your name tomorrow if I meet you today, but could probably tell you the color of your eyes, what you were wearing, whether you had any jewellery or makeup on & how you carried yourself. (Who? Oh, the girl in the pink shirt with the blonde hair & green eyes who smelled like vanilla? Yeah, I remember her. Loved her watch. What was her name again...?)

5. That leads into this. I don't care if you're prettier than me, smarter, skinnier or whatever, but I will do my damnedest to try to feel on par with you in my confidence level. I have struggled with self-esteem & confidence throughout my life, and have done so much better in recent years to learn self-value & to like myself as-is. While others are trying to be the smartest, funniest, coolest or whatever, I am just trying to like myself when I'm around the rest of you. It takes effort to relax enough to be myself. There's no time to be the anything-est, but I sure am proud of me when I can communicate well & carry myself well in the presence of others. I will stress out and pray my heart out beforehand if I have to be around new people. This doesn't translate to when I'm working (If I'm shooting your wedding I'm totally different than if I'm at your birthday party as a guest. In work-mode I know what I'm doing, so I am totally outgoing. It's when I'm expected to be me in a socal setting involving new people that is nervewracking.)
(To really relax and be myself takes a level of trust on my part that not many people have reached. There are few people who know me really well, but I sure do love the ones who do.)
:)

Yeah, I'm a dork. That's okay. :) Now I can tag someone else! Ha!
Holly and Robin you two are it!

edit: Okay, so this morning, reading over this entry I am sure that the 5th one isn't an idiosyncrasy so much, but I'm leaving it since I can't think of one at the moment to replace it.

cuteness

It seems I haven't had much to say lately, but I did just download some cute pictures of my babe.

Two Sides

Well, there are two sides to every story. I spoke about my fears before Keith & Libby came. Now that they've left I'm wanting to talk about their visit again.
It went well. It was pleasant actually. They earned our trust, and began what I hope will be a wonderful relationship with Brandon. They spent time getting to know him and they shopped. Holy cow, did they shop! I hope they had fun. I know Brandon did.
Libby confided to Grandma Nadine that Keith had been so nervous about coming that he was physically ill & almost backed out. He was nervous too. We all were, I guess. I'm glad he decided to come anyway. It can be hard to face things sometimes, but I hope he found it worthwhile. I think so.
I didn't recognize Keith at first. Man, he has changed. Again, I guess we all have. Nine years will do that. Beyond the physical changes, he seems to have grown up some. This is a good thing. I adore his wife. Libby is every bit as likable as I envisioned. She was so sweet & good to my kids. Seriously, we all loved her. Another good thing.
I was worried about Vern, who I'm sure has his own set of feelings concerning this, but who is so quiet & hard to read. He was awesome. He took us all up to snowbird, and didn't swim much on Brandon's birthday, making sure they were comfortable around his family. (They didn't have their bathing suits here.) He played host well. Whatever he was feeling, I was proud of him.
So we're on new territory where they are concerned. I hope Keith & I both will be less afraid in the future. And that Vern & Libby will both continue to be wonderful & supportive spouses. Mostly, I hope that Brandon will be able to continue to get to know his other dad. He seems a little more sure of himself somehow. I'm so happy for him.

Libby, Brandon & Keith.

Kirsten

Well, little Vern has starred in a couple of posts (Life at Four and Shhhhh...) and I love sharing pictures of Elijah, since he's my baby and all. With Brandon's birthday and some new pictures of him, even he has been a reluctant star for an entry or two. So where's Kirsten? Well, I did post a picture of her, similar to this one the day after she turned eight.

She's not a wild and crazy four year old, a cute & drooling baby or a taller-than-me teenager. She's a quiet, active & creative soul with a beautiful smile and a great sense of humour. She's working on her cursive and still trying to earn the pink bedroom. She's a girly-girl in some ways & a tomboy at heart. She's my Kirstie-Leigh, and this is her entry. I love you sweetie.

I am here.

Yep. My life is boring some days, crazy some days and not exactly how I pictured it. Who knew I'd have four children? Not me. And I love it. My life is full. There are dirty diapers, scrapes, bruises and messes like you wouldn't believe. There are also dogpiles with me on the bottom, hugs, kisses and so much laughter. I'm not sure I'm winning the war I've been having with the pile of laundry. My hands are dry from doing sinks full of dishes. Yet somehow, I am happy. At least I think I am. One thing I have learned through having a family is that it's not about me. It's about us. I am happy when they are happy. Really. I've wondered at times if in all the craziness of motherhood I've lost sight of me in there somewhere. Not really. I am here. Somewhere between the mom, wife, friend & such there is just me. The girl who used to walk Yonge street from Finch to the harbourfront. Who danced at Depeche Mode concerts & cried when she found out that Serena & James were going out again. My rollerskates became rollerblades. I found Vern. I had children. I grew up. (That's a bit debatable some days, I'm told.) But it's still me.

A new one of B

Here's a new shot of B that he approves of. Or at least he gave me permission to share it. This was on his birthday. I got some good ones that day, before we headed to the pool to celebrate.

Okay, I had to add another one. (Shhhhh... I didn't ask permission.) So I guess that's actually another two of B.

Eight

Kirsten turned eight yesterday! Isn't she beautiful?
She's still working on earning her own bedroom here. (The pink room is still basically empty - my scrap stuff is in there but could easily moved if she'd just keep her shared room clean for a week or so.) I asked what she'd want for her birthday if she could have anything, and she said $100 or the pink room. At least one of those two things is possible. If only she didn't hate to pick up after herself so much.

fourteen

Brandon is 14 today.

I had the opportunity to tell him my 3 guidelines for my teeneaged children.

1. I trust you.

2. You can tell me anything.

3. I love you unconditionally, thus will forgive you and love you no matter what.

I'm a worrywart type mom. It was important for me to say those things to him this week. He's been off having fun getting to know his biological dad. I have been a bundle of nerves. It's going really well though.
Brandon is such an awesome person. I'm so proud of him for who he is, and how he handles himself. He amazes me on a regular basis. I love you B! Happy birthday!

Sorry for the picture repeat. Brandon does not love having his picture taken, and is very picky about which ones I can share. I'll have to see if I can get a good one of him today. :)

33

While we were packing & without the internet I had a birthday. Yay me! I'm older. Well, it was a good one. Lunch out, Hires for dinner. (Mmmmmmmm...) Getting Lauren soaked on the bumper boats at Boondocks. Then Vern came home with this for me...

I hadn't meant to hint that I wanted a Calla Lily plant when I'd eyed them at Lowes, but I'm thrilled that he picked me up one anyway. My favorite. Maybe I can even keep it alive for awhile. We shall see.
After boondocks, even though I was wet and had stuck my hair in pigtails to get it off my neck I let Brandon take a picture of me. Oh my, I saw these shots & was ickified. It's okay that I look my age, but since when is it okay to have crinkly eyes & break out at the same time? (Yes people, they are crinkles, not wrinkles. I am still in denial.) I looked at these and felt positively pooky. The only way I'm even sharing is by messing with one enough that it is no longer an actual picture of me, just a sort of representation. Of me. Age 33.

Just like I said.

There's this old house we're settling into...

with a worn wood facade

a big yard

a great back door

and great light outside the front door.

There's a big window in the front room.

Big kids will have their own rooms.

I have my own little corner.

There are some cool little details

and other important things
...like ceiling fans

and a much-anticipated feature.


Yeah, like I said. This place will work just fine. I love the downstairs family room. The kids have a play room. Brandon loves his room. Kirsten is still earning the pink bedroom. (She's excited to finally have her own room hopefully! That girl needs to learn to clean up after herself.) I like some of the details. Like the doorknobs upstairs. (See the detail picture.) And the cool paneled old back door. There's great light for photography in many rooms (I have been playing...) The 1/3 of an acre or so with fruit trees will be nice. And oh my... a couple of ceiling fans (one above my bed!) and the much-loved-by-all swamp cooler. I wish we were finished with the unpacking so I could show more. (Pictures of rooms full of boxes are not all that exciting.) I'm starting to like it. It kind of feels a little like
home.

This is a test. This is only a test.

If this were a real entry I would be prepared with pictures & such.

As for now, I am just checking in.

What a crazy week it has been. We're still unpacking here and have to make one last trip to clean at the old house. Our new home will be wonderful - the kids are adjusting well & I'm thinking I will really like it here.

To see this house from the street I'd say it's not-so-pretty. It has an old, worn wood facade. Not a style I'd choose, but that's okay. There are lots of things I do like about this place. Hey, we are no longer melting! In fact, we froze the first night here. We're adjusting. We're happy. When I can find my card reader for my computer I'll post some of the pictures I've taken and you'll see. For now you'll just have to trust me.

Well, I should unpack.
There will be an actual entry soon.