Does she know?

After a rough sort of a night full of sadness and doubt I ended up with a sunny sort of day. To say that I was not looking forward to today would be an understatement. Still pregnant on your due date with an ominous doctor appointment? Yeah, so not fun. But it didn't end up being so bad, and somewhere last night between all of the tears I figured something important out. Something I wanna share. Then I'll tell you all about today's appointment. :)

I started out last night all mad that my prayers and wishes for the last few weeks have been seemingly disregarded. There are good reasons why I want Maiah safely here before my kiddos go back to school & even better reasons to sincerely hope for another vbac. A c-section recovery with Elijah still so young and attached & a newborn all day? So not a pretty or easy thought. For so many reasons. Yet here I am still pregnant. I know I'm ready to meet her, and my family is all ready too. My body's been doing it's thing, being at the "any time now" point for forever and yet she's still in there. So I got to thinking about Maiah. Is she ready? Well, she's at full term - there should be no developmental issues - at this point it's just weight gain & waiting on her part too. She's got to be getting all squishy in there. I don't know how to explain it, but she seems like long baby.

Anyhow, while going back and forth between Maiah and myself, thinking that I really am ready for the pain of labor and the exhausting schedule of a newborn while hoping that she's ready for life out here something dawned on me about babies. She's been all warm and cozy for 9 months. She's never felt hunger - food just happens to make it to her through the umbilical cord on a steady basis. She's never felt cold, pain or fear. She's had some hiccups, and may have as hard of a time finding a comfortable sleeping position as me at this point but that's it. No wonder babies cry. Can you imagine being all cozy and warm in there, then going through the shock & pain of being squished through an opening smaller than you are into a bright, not always warm world where you suddenly have to rely on other people to understand and take care of your basic comforts? Feeling hunger for the first time, and cold - maybe hearing loud unpleasant noises and feeling the pain of your first little blood draw. I really did some thinking about this and realized that the old saying that you can't spoil a newborn is true. The comfort of being held close and hearing her mothers heartbeat - of that warmth from being cuddled and the familiar voices of her family, feeding her whenever she stirs - even if it's 5 times a night. How on earth can you give too much of these things to a newborn?

I hope she knows. I hope my little Maiah knows that I'm ready and fully prepared to do my best to make sure that she's greeted with smiles, love and every comfort I'm capable of giving. I hope she knows it's okay to leave what she's used to behind whenever she's brave and ready.

My biggest fear is having to have a ceserean section which would make it hard on me to be everything for her & her big brother all day by ourselves. Healing from that would make it difficult to care for Elijah, and he would lose a lot of his comforts on top of having to share my lovin' with a new baby. It just seems like it would be so hard on him. So that's why I've been sad, scared & freaking out with my due date approaching. Well here I am due date and all. I've been here before - it's so not fun, but yeah. My doctor made my day. I love him to pieces. He looked at me this morning and said "I know how much this means to you, so we won't even talk about scheduling a c-section until next week." Things are progressing nicely, and while he's not allowed to let me hit 2 weeks over, there's a really good chance I won't. Especially if I'm not all stressed out. Is he awesome or what? I walked in there so upset that my initial blood pressure reading was high. He re-took it afterwards and it had come down nicely. He just smiled & reassured me again. Oh, and stripped my membranes something good. :p So yeah. Still here, still pregnant but in a much better frame of mind today. :)
Oh, for those who follow the numbers thing... 3 cm, 80% effaced & -1. Good progress. Yay! :)

Sorry for another wordy post with no pics. Maybe I can at least get some pics and rectify that. :p Okay, so it was quick & the puffiness shows. Not so fantabulous. Gogo looking how you feel I guess. :p
Thanks Kirsten!

days

Sorry it's been days again. Time for another little round of catch-up. :)

The kiddos had a blast Christmas morning. They each only asked for a few things, and consequentially got everything they wanted and then some. It was an early morning (they were all up & ready to go by 6 am) followed by a busy day. (We spent most of the rest of the day at Nina's with Vern's family.)
The amount of snow that we've seen this past week has been insane. To say we had a white Christmas would be an understatement. lol
Yesterday was a little crazy. The battery died on the navigator last night while we were out shopping. We were stranded in front of game stop until grandpa Kent & grandma Nadine came to the rescue. Hooray for help on a very cold night! Brrr... Then right when we got home our power went out for awhile. Crazy huh? Yeah, and all of our candles were scented and we had a bunch going. Vanilla, lavender, I forget what else... we ended up hanging out in a very perfumed room. :p
Then I didn't sleep last night. I spent 7 hours (from 3 am until 10 am) timing contractions and thinking/hoping it was time. Then they slowed and yeah, I'm still here. I was really hoping. :( Tuesday is my due date & my next appointment. I'm running out of time and just plain sad that Maiah's not here yet. Still hoping to somehow avoid a c-section & to get her here this year. ;)
So yeah, I'm kinda down, being that I'm still here & pregnant and all. I have the worst headache. Vern's been distracting himself with WoW & stuff all day & I've been just hanging out cuddling with Ej, reading and trying very hard not to cry. Oh and showering - hot water is my friend. :p Owie. lol

And since I've been kinda absent I have stuff I wanna say to a bunch of people...

Thanks for the rescue Grandpa & Grandma!
So happy you're blogging Viv!
Miss you Jason! /squish
Hang in there Jill!
Thanks for the support Wendy!
I promise we'll call you when there's news Robin!
Hope there's been raiding, heroics & fun going on Omega Co! Miss you guys.
Thanks for hangin' in there blog readers! Hopefully there'll be pics & fun things to share soon. :)

It's Christmas Eve!

...and I'm still pregnant! lol
I must say that I'm very grateful to have spent the day with my family and to be here for the excitement in the morning. I do wish Maiah were with us as more than a (very large) bump, but hey - at least we're together. My kiddos are all happy & excited - it'll be so awesome for me to witness their morning and be with 'em. I wasn't sure if I'd be here or at the hospital and we were prepared for every possible Christmas baby scenario - but so far it looks like she's waiting. :) Well, with the presents ready & the stockings stuffed I should probably at least try to sleep.
I hope that all of you blog readers have a wonderful Christmas! :)

a Sunday update

So Wednesday was a maybe baby kind of day. Dr. Larsen got the contractions going so well, and they kept up through the night. But then they stopped. Then Friday night they kicked up even better and we were almost to the point of having a foot out the door ...then those stopped too. I was up all Friday night timing 'em and totally convinced I'd be holding her by now. I'm not. And I'm tired. And emotionally ...yeah. I so wanted to avoid finding myself in this place. Apologies to all of those folks who were excited along with us. I think I'm just gonna focus on Christmas and my kiddos who're here, and try not to think about how I'm 9 days from my due date and that close to having to schedule a c-section.
We've already tried everything we could find to help things along and I have my last appointment on Tuesday, so it's crunch time. I'm sure he'll try to help me get labor going one last time. He did joke about Christmas babies - maybe he was onto something with that. :p It was the one thing (outside of the c-section of course) that I didn't want. Been hoping for Christmas with all of my kiddos. :p Well anyway, that's the been a bunch of days since I posted kind of update. I'll have a new entry up with the annual Christmas Eve post unless there's real baby news.
Meanwhile, thank you Lauren for your help & support this weekend. Would have been cool if things had happened like we thought. :) And thank you Richard & Jason for being so awesome about sending /love this way. /extrasquishyhugs to both of you! Apologies in general for my tendancy to get quiet & disappear. I'm really not so much fun to be around right now anyhow. I'll re-appear when I feel I'm worth being around. No more false alarms though, that I can promise. :)
Merry Christmas blog readers!

a little randomness & maybe baby

~I've been craving Jamaican patties out of nowhere. I do so wish that they existed in Utah. Sadness. With maybe a vachon flakie to follow. Mmmmm... I so need a trip to Toronto. :p
~Omega Co. went to Obsidian Sanctum last night & got it done. Go guys go! I wish I could have been there, but am so happy they're raiding & getting folks some gear. Brandon didn't get to go on their raid, but did get to pug the vault again & got him some gloves. Yay B! I just hope we don't lose him again with his general lack of guild action. That'd be so sad. I really can't wait for my life to settle back into some normalcy so I can join in on the fun. I miss my WoW time, and more importantly - my WoW friends. :(
~I think Vern is nesting. lol He's been on a fix-it kick this week around the house. All kinds of little things that have needed to be done forever have suddenly been done. Go Vern! :) I'm sure he's just needing a distraction.
~I've been watching movies a little more than usual with the owie downtime of late. Hancock & Knight's Tale back to back is yum factor x2. I love me some Will & some Heath.
~Brandon is so awesome. He wrapped most of the Christmas gifts today. I just have to wrap his and we're done. ...and with a little more than a week to spare?! Yeah, that's just crazy. I'm usually up on Christmas Eve wrapping all by myself. Thanks B! :)
~Thanks to Nina too. :) She's been so awesome with making sure we have everything for Maiah. She has some good grandma insincts, and brought over some of what we still needed. (Plus the prettiest little Christmas-y dress. Yay!) Between her and Ben & Wendy we have enough little pink things that Maiah will be warm & comfy. :)
~Our neighbors have all started the Christmas treat sharing thing they do every year. We've had some yummy fudge, candy and cookies brought to our door so far. I don't know how all those ladies do it, but my kiddos sure do love that they think of us when it comes to sharing. :)
~My appointment went well this morning. Dr. Larsen did an awesome job of stripping the membranes, kicking things up a notch from where they've been. 60% & -1 (otherwise the same) is the number update, but if these pains get a little meatier overnight and don't subside we're looking at a maybe baby kind of night/morning. We shall see. :)

no news

Hola blog readers! Sorry it's been days again - just call me a slacker. :p

So yeah, no news is exactly that - no news.

Everyone around me is all anxious and waiting for me to announce "it's time!" or "she's here!" or something, and I'm just trying not to go crazy. I think she's dropped some more judging by the pain increase. :p Yeah, I'm as uncomfortable as I look. Yep, it hurts. Sometimes a lot. Yeah, any time now. Or, at least any time between now & the end of the month. No, I'm not in labor yet.
For something that I have no control over and that is as emotionally draining as these last weeks it's funny how many questions I answer a day. I'd love to get one massage or something for each time I get asked "well aren't you excited?" or "when do you think you'll have her?" Of course, and I have no clue. Sometime soon-ish. Hopefully not Christmas eve. :p
Vern's even home from work at the moment, waiting to see if today's the day. He's king of the anxious people. Yeah... Poor guy. All I've got to go on is that I'm not in labor right now. It could happen, but yeah. It could be next week.

It's a nice thing that everyone's so excited, I just have no real answers until it's time. lol I refuse to join the anxious people, since for me that means disappointment & emotional crud every moment that isn't the one. No thanks. I'd rather be patient & enjoy the excitement when it really happens.

Kirsten & I did escape Saturday night to go see Twilight, and I did make it to OC's first Naxx raid. Oh, and I think we're done with Christmas shopping. Yay! Now if I could just snag me some vent/play time with J, get me some access to a nice big soaking tub to pass time in & take Elijah on one last mommy/babe date before it really is time that'd be fantabulous. :)

a pink kind of post :p

It's been a crazy couple of days. Been making sure things are ready for Maiah, had my weekly appointment (and subsequent upswing in contractions and owieness) and trying (largely unsuccessfully) to spend at least a little time doing things I love (like playing wow with friends.) I got a little of that in yesterday, but not yet today. I miss 'em.

For those who speak baby (or at least know a little about labor & delivery) at yesterday's appointment I was 50% effaced, dilated to a 2, and she's at -2 station. (Yeah, she's only moved down a bit, but still.) For those who don't speak baby stuff - things are coming along nicely & I'll meet this baby girl sometime soon. :p My doctor swept my membranes yesterday, so that's why the upswing in bh contractions and such. Just made for an uncomfy day. I do love being at the point where my doctor says "see you next week if not sooner" as I walk out of there. :DToday has been a day of cleaning and laundry, trying to keep myself moving & even taking a few pics of the baby stuff to share. ;) I so love the warm & snuggly sweater-type thing that Vern picked out for her. It's soooo soft. She can't come home without wearing something Pooh-related either, and the hat makes me smile. Her bed is ready, her drawers have some little pink clothes in 'em, we have newborn diapers & I even have a bag mostly packed for the hospital.There are a few more things I'd like to get done, but could go into labor and at least be fine with where things are at. The whole no-phone thing freaks me out a little, but at the very least I have nice neighbors & grandmas who live close if Vern is stuck in traffic or whatever.Of course, with all that said - I'm not thinking she'll be here today or tomorrow, and am not anxious or impatient at all. Just happy to be close & ready to hold her whenever she decides to come.

hey hey

So it's been days again. :p This little blog of mine has been neglected. I'm not even sure what I have to say yet, but I do have a picture of Elijah that makes me smile.Cute, huh. My silly little boy. :)

So yeah, I'm still here. Just trying to be ready for Christmas & for bringing Maiah home. At 37 weeks and hoping for my vbac I'm doing what I can to help things along. Well, everything but the walking - I've been in so much pain the last few days that I can't pretend like exercise has happened. It hasn't. lol In any case, go Maiah go! Can't wait to have her in my arms. :)

Hodgepodge for Thursday

It's time to work on getting Maiah here. My doctor reminded me yesterday that with the whole vbac thing I'm not allowed to go past my date. Well, I can go over – it just means a scheduled c-section. :( At yesterday's appointment though she was at a -3 station (at least she's in position :p) and I'm dilated to a 1. Slowly but surely? I know and am not afraid to use all of the tricks in the book to move things along. I just know my body & realize I have to start encouraging things now if I'm going to be holding her by the 30th. Gogo walks and other stuff... :)
Oh, and I've been so stressed and consumed with other things that I've had several friends ask if I'm excited about Maiah. “You are excited, right...?” Yes, I am. Holding her is a happy thought. :) I think it's been fairly obvious for the past weeks though that I'm not doing a fantabulous job of focusing on the happy stuff with everything going on, so my attitude probably comes across wonky. I'm not always as strong as I pretend to be, and I've been an emotional wreck. Apologies for not being my, um, chipper self. Still trying to get back to that place. :)
Oh, I got Arinne to level 80 in the wee hours of the night. Nobody else in the guild was on when I finally did it, but I did take a random screenshot of her yesterday in her slowly acquired Northrend blues. (It's so sad to be replacing all of her hard-earned epics. :p) Not sure why I liked this fish tank-ish place, but I did. :) lol
Alrighty, I just tried to find some recent pics I could share & am being reminded that I totally need to play with my camera more.
Kirsten did take some shots at our family gathering the weekend before Thanksgiving. She got one of Vern (with laptop going as always... lol) and one of Brandon & I.Indoor lighting like that is tricky. She did well. I'll have her shooting like a pro by the time she's in high school. ;)

Meanwhile, with a baby update, a WoW update & some random family pics I think we'll call that a blog entry. Time to go find some pain meds & lunch.
Have a great day!

Yay!

We did it! Kirsten & I finished the cleaning I wanted done, and then Elijah helped her decorate the tree. Little Vern helped some too, while Vern slept in front of his movie and B played WoW. I let the kiddos decorate by themselves this year - I was feeling way too sore & icky to join in - but it was nice to let them enjoy it for once & just grab some pics. It was funny, there were clumps of ornaments at Elijah's height that Kirsten ended up trying to balance out and it still somehow looks different to me but they had fun & I'm happy it's up so yeah.Oh, and Kirsten pointed something out to me tonight that freaked me out just a little. We're at the 28 day mark as of today. o.O Wow. Just, um... wow. I need to get feeling better, finish getting things together and find my energy & smiles because this little one will be here in no time. The whole out-of-it-ness, stress, owieness, braxton hicks, sickies & holiday stuff has already made it seem like these last weeks are flying by 'til she gets here. :p I see my doctor every week as of this week & everything. I so need to get it together & be feeling normal so we can be ready. I need to figure stuff out like who's gonna want a call/text/email from the hospital & make sure we have everything she needs ready. I keep thinking of little things. Agh!
...And of course there's still Christmas stuff to figure out before then.
Wish me luck! :)

Happy December!

Tradition says that my Christmas tree would have gone up yesterday, but it didn't. With the sickies hanging out here the cleaning that comes before the decorating has gone way slow. Sadness. :( I've spent the day trying to catch up, hoping to get the tree put up tonight, but we shall see. It may end up being tomorrow. :p

I did get my Christmas banner up on my blog though. Lazy me, I'm just recycling the one I made the first year I was doing this. That poor angel has been retired and everything. Hmmm... Maybe that's why I still like it. :) She was part of my very first Christmas tree. Back from single mom/college days. I still have quite a few of the ornaments I bought back then, just not the tree or the angel.

Anyhow, I feel like such a slacker once again. It seems like most of my fellow bloggers decorated this weekend like I would have, and here I am hoping to get it done soon. Of course, there will be pictures & such when we get to. :) For now you all get to hear me whine or whatever. Again. This is not a good habit I've been developing, huh. :p

Kirsten helped me throw this together to add to this post since I was worried I'd have no Christmas-y pics just yet. Not that this is all that Christmas-y, but yeah. It's what I had to work with. :p
(She even took the pic - it was on Thanksgiving & I wasn't feeling great, but it's something, right? Yeah, I'm so glad we'll have plenty other stuff to take pics of over the next few weeks. :p)

Kirsten

A quick shot on Thanksgiving day.
Isn't she beautiful? :)

Happy Thanksgiving :)

May your day be full of good things, and your tummy be full of good food.

:)

a Monday kind of entry

Ah it's been days again. My poor neglected blog. :p
Was a long sort of a weekend. Been tired, sore & taking care of sick kiddos. Again. Little Vern is home sick from school today, and Elijah & I are both sniffly. They're watching movies & I'm wading through laundry. Fun huh? Just taking it easy, trying to feel better. Gogo cold & flu season with school-aged kiddos. :p I just hope everyone's feeling better in time for Thanksgiving. :)

It's a good thing that my boys are easy to please & just hanging out too. I'm so very out-of-it. My thoughts are in California with someone who means the world to me. Still thinking about Jason - sending more hugs'nstuff, prayers & whatever else I can come up with his way. It's not really my place to talk about it here (not that I know a whole lot) but I found out that he's in the hospital and it's serious. :( Just had to mention that my heart & my thoughts are with him & his family. More than I know how to say.

Well, the original plan was to give a list of things I'm thankful for this holiday week, and even in my current state of out-of-it-ness I can think of lots of things I'm thankful for.
~for my cute kiddos, the littlest of whom are still all snuggled up watching movies.
~for my heating pad that makes sitting here bearable.
~for the leftover stuffed crust pizza that I'm about to call lunch.
~for my friends. I'm so lucky to have the friends I do.
~for my blanket. It's cold down here today. brrrr...
Five good things. :)

Have to go switch the laundry & check how Vern's day is going. He's been having back problems & was headed to the chiropractor today. It'd be good if one of the 2 of us were able to move & such, and my pains aren't going anywhere just yet. 5 more weeks til Maiah's here. Oh my!

Happy Monday!

Today-ing

Thinking about Jason. Hoping he's feeling okay & that he gets some answers out of the tests going on today. It's no fun to feel like crud. Hugs'nstuff going out to him. :(
Coloring with Elijah. Had to stop when we couldn't find a sharpener for the red pencil crayon. Gogo Lightning Mcqueen!
Bugging Kirsten to do her chores. As always. She has Christmas music going on upstairs while she pretends like she's working. That's my girl. :)
E-mailing Vern to figure out dinner tonight. The rice is smelling so yummy.
Working on the last bit of the last slideshow I need to finish up before I can declare myself work-free until I after have Maiah here.
Trying to get the laundry under control. Which squirrelly type out there has stolen the laundry fairy? Hmmmm...? I'm in need of some help over here. :p
Homework-ing with little Vern. He's doing so awesome at school. :)
Poking my head into WoW. Was a quiet day in our guild. Think maybe I'm not the only person I know who was in need of a nap? lol
Planning Thanksgiving dinner at Nina's. Yum.
Wishing everyone a fantabulous Thursday. :)

oh boy

I had my 34 week appointment yesterday. One more 2-weeker & then we're down to weekly ones. o.O We're getting close. Oh boy. I've had a couple of comments lately that Maiah's dropping too. I guess it's kinda nice to have a little more room for my organs & stuff, but I'm hurting more than ever in my hips. :p Fun stuff. Well, kinda. It's fun to think I'll be holding her in no time. :)

Meanwhile, sorry I've not been blogging. I still need to upload my pics from the weekend to share, and I'm dying to get some recent shots of my kiddos for here. My poor blog has been missing their cuteness factor for awhile.

Well, I have a mountain of clean laundry to fold & a little boy who wants a yaya. Off I go.
Have a great day people!! :)

Just in case...

...anyone's wondering where I've been I thought I'd check in.
I'm still here, just a little zombaliscious & unable to see straight. I kinda look like this... @@ thanks to photoshop & acdsee.
Anyway, if I keep working at the same pace that I did all weekend and through last night there's a very good chance I'll finish up & be done with all slideshows and digital negatives in time to hand 'em over tomorrow. There's a good 18 hours or so of work left on the slideshows though, so I need to stop typing and get back to it. :) Wish me luck!

No More Words

So Ej & I played with the camera this evening. Well, mostly he played with the remote & I made faces. I did get him to come over for the one shot though. :) I wanted to put something up on this little blog of mine that wasn't just me typing away & it was cold out so we did these.Don't mind the girl in red. She knows she looks like crud when she feels like it so... :p

Oh, and Vern was just playing with us when he said he only got one copy of the game. He came home with all three. :) He was disappointed I didn't react much to that e-mail. He apparently had no clue what kind of blah mood I've been in - thought he'd have some fun & I ruined it. lol So I did get wrath installed & even peeked in for a minute, but then I went back to work.

Wrath

Vern didn't want to pick up our copies at the midnight release last night. Brandon & I tried to convince him. :p I could log in anyway and try to live vicariously through friends that I'm sure are playing with new content, but nah. I have work to do and am not feeling all that great.

So here I sit, all excited that the Wrath expansion came out, celebrating with some green tea & painkillers. :) There will be some sort of excited post with screenshots when I venture over & play - just not sure when that will be. We have a crazy weekend ahead.

Hope anyone reading this is having themselves a fantabulous kind of day! :)

*edit. So Vern went at lunch to pick up our pre-paid copies of the game & the store only had one left?! (Nice job holding onto the pre-paid copies there.) Sooo... I voted myself out of the fight for our one copy and will wait until tomorrow or whenever they have 'em in. Figures. lol

quiet & broken

Yeah. It's been a quiet couple of days.
Lauren came to pick Elijah up early yesterday for a day full of fun, making for a nice quiet day for me. I got a bunch of work done that I needed to & was able to deal with some emotional stuff. (Okay, so I just spent some time crying. It worked - I felt better afterward. I'm sure it's the pregnancy thing - I've been a little sensitive/emotional lately. Spent 2 days on the verge of tears for reasons I couldn't put my finger on and just needed to cry it out. I almost feel normal again. No more broken April. :) Yay! Well with the exception of my hip. lol Its hurting so bad. :p)

Today has been quiet too. Elijah's been content to just hang out on my lap for cuddles while I work. (It's been awesome - lovin' & cuddles are so part of the magic that makes me feel whole. Thanks babe.) He's been content enough that I've been able to keep the TV off. (A day without qubo=heaven.) I haven't even been listening to music like I usually do while in PS. Guess why!?
Yes, I somehow killed another headset. :p I have quite the track record. O.o Last month Vern replaced the most recent dead headset with a new one for him. I inherited his old one, which was working just fine until now. :p Sadness. If I wiggle the wire & hold it just right there's sound, otherwise nada. I can grab the little earbuds from my mp3 player - it just won't be the same for vent. :p So not cool. Crazy huh? Yeah he's not gonna be happy with that news.

You'd think my camera's been broken or something too with the lack of pictures and all. :p I'll have to play with it some soon to liven up this little blog of mine. Meanwhile, I hope you readers are having a great week.

Smile! :)

5 days?!

That seems like a long time for me to have nothing to say. :p

I haven't been feeling super fantabulous lately - just have reached the point in pregnancy where stuff hurts all of the time on top of cold season where I'm trying really hard not to get anything worse than the sniffles. :p I've felt just kind of rough & out of it. Won't take long feeling like this for me to be ready to just have Maiah here already. One last big owie & then I get to hold her? Yeah, I'm probably closer than I'd admit out loud. Overall we're just not ready though. :p
My younger kiddos headed back to school today. I'm hoping they had fun while off-track. We didn't really do much of anything during their break - just hung out at home, made cookies, went to the park early on (before it got so cold) and had cake for breakfast one day.
Lauren's coming down today, and Brian flies in on Friday - we have a big family get-together on Saturday. I have a few things I want done before then, so it's bound to be a crazy busy sort of week.
I've been slow in phone, pm & e-mail responses to people of late & apologize. I'm not wanting to say no to people who want/need me for various things, yet I have enough going right now (and am feeling just cruddy enough) that I'm hesitant to jump in and take on more stuff at the moment. So to those of you who haven't heard one way or the other it means I want to help you enough to be considering it. I have a couple of people on my mind who'll be hearing from me soon. I promise.
Meanwhile, I should probably go switch the laundry & get my bagel out of the toaster.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Monday!

brrrrr...

So this is what I woke up to this morning:It was still coming down hard at that point. Fun huh? Even better when without thinking I threw on my flipflops for this morning's doctor appointment. lol I did grab a sweater... :p

My kiddos are having a blast out in the backyard at the moment & I'm wishing I hadn't killed my camera battery uploading photos this morning. Looks like it's supposed to stay cold and keep going throughout the week though, so I'll get some pics of my cuties soon. :)

so it wasn't as quick as I thought :p

My kiddos have been crazy today (we'll blame the Halloween candy that has been disappearing much faster than I'd like) which has led to a headache that matches the hip & lower back pain I woke up with.

You know what kind of entry happens when I don't feel well, right? Yep - the quick & easy meme kind. I have so many things I could be doing, but I honestly think a warm bath is what's going to happen once I get up out of this chair. :p

the Monday Countdown meme :)

10 websites you have bookmarked
youtube
ilp
the WoW community site
mpix
the squirrely message board
thottbot
projectlore
msn
photobucket
um, my blog :p
9 movies you own
the Fifth Element
Big Daddy
a Knight's Tale
Hitch
Batman Begins
Mr. Deeds
I am Legend
50 First Dates
Gone in 60 Seconds
8 words/phrases you say often
thank you
I love you
whatever
where's my kisses
cool
let's do it
yummy ;)
was that okay?
7 things you'd like to do or see before you die
become an American citizen
take my kiddos to Disneyland
have all the dental work done my kiddos & I need
visit my mom (and introduce my younger kiddos to her)
watch the sun set on a tropical beach somewhere
take photos of castles & architecture in England, Scotland & France
cheer my kiddos on as they grow up and hopefully find happiness.
6 people you're thankful for
Robin who checks in on me & tries to keep me in touch with my family.
Jason who makes my day on a regular basis - he's almost as good as Elijah at getting me to smile :)
Brandon who knows me so well and watches out for me. He's awesome.
Lauren who's so awesomely patient & who I've been so proud of as I've watched her grow up.
Vern who works his butt off to try to take care of things for our family.
Nina, who does so much for her family and who's done an admirable job this past year of adjusting to life and keeping things going, no matter how hard some moments have been.
5 places you love to eat
Cafe Rio (Mexican!!)
the Olive Garden (Italian!!)
PF Chang's (Chinese!!)
Hire's (the bestest local burger place)
Quiznos (my most favorite subs. yum!!)
4 things on your to-do list right now
find & take some acetaminophen, e-mail Janell, make Vern his cake and call Heidi.
3 things you loved about today
the sound of rain when I slept, LV's backrub as I sat at my computer (thanks babe!) and spending some time this morning in vent with some favorite friends while playing WoW.
2 recent picsKirsten actually took these of me earlier today. I need to take some shots of my kiddos or some Fall-ish ones before it's too late - there's just way too many pics of me going on here lately. :p
1 song

Jason Mraz - I'm Yours. I'd never heard his stuff at all before, but the other day Jody sent me a tell recommending this one so I looked it up today. It's totally different from anything I've been listening to or anything he's sent me before (he's the one who initially shared some of my faves, like Broken (Seether & Amy Lee) and is responsible for my Papa Roach addiction (started with Forever) and yeah, has just recommended lots of different music over the last couple of years.) This one is so random, but it's a happy little song that got Elijah dancing earlier.

Have a great day! :)

November is...

...a time for thanksgiving, remembrance & love.

At least to me it is. It's all about spending time with the people I care about and showing them just how much they mean to me. It's about being thankful for all that we have, and this year for me it's also a time for remembrance.

Last November was filled with an amazing mixture of emotions with Vern Sr. passing away mid-month. I still miss him, yet I still feel the amazing calm & the tremendous love that prevailed then, and lingers even now when I think about him. What a fitting month for a man like him to leave this world. It's hard to believe it's been a year, but here I am on November first, thinking about all that I have to be grateful for, and being so fully aware of the anniversary that looms between now & thanksgiving with an odd sense of peace, gratitude & happiness.I'm hoping that those who read this blog of mine feel the same warmth & love that I do at this time of year. There's so much beauty to be enjoyed, so many blessings to be thankful for and as always, so many reasons to smile. I hope this little entry finds all of you doing just that. :)

Happy November!

costumes, candy & baby talk

There is just way too much sugar in my house at the moment. :p
The little kiddos all had fun trick or treating, and Brandon was a trooper taking the little boys everywhere. Kirsten went with Katie again & had a blast. It was a beautiful night too - mild with just a tiny bit of a drizzle at times. The boys recycled their costumes from last year, and Kirsten came up with this fun idea since she'd grown way too much to even think of using hers again. We stopped by all of the Grandma's houses before the kids headed out, and went and had us some chicken while the kiddos did their thing.

My special thanks to the neighbors, grandmas & those we bumped into who told me I looked pretty today. It seems like the more I feel like a beached whale (okay, so maybe not quite that big, but still) the more people try to tell me I'm looking good. I do appreciate it. :) Oh, and the almost 32 week Maiah report is that I've decided she's crazy. lol She's growing so much & is so active lately. Her movements aren't jabs and pokes anymore, they're more like tossing & turning or dragging her foot across my ribcage. Kirsten is the most patient one who's felt her move a bunch, but today LV & Elijah felt some kicks too. The stronger & bigger she gets the more excited I am to meet her. :) Go Maiah go!!

Have a great weekend!

(Oh Lauren, I haven't forgotton your request. ;) It's just been a crazy week with computer issues & Halloween so I haven't put it together yet.)

I hope they have some coats down there.

...and enjoy the pretty icicles & snowflakes.

Yep, believe it or not I remembered something on time. It doesn't happen very often, (okay, so like never) but today is a special someone's birthday & here I am posting an entry. Crazy, I know. I'm not a day late!! Go me!! :)
Here's to wishing a very happy birthday to Jason. May he somehow feel all of the lovin' I'm sending his way & have the most awesome kind of day. :)

breakfast again

Oh yeah...
I thought I'd share with you all what I've dubbed my little jewels of juicy goodness. I managed to not eat my half until I'd taken a pic or two. Kirsten on the other hand is a jewel devourer. Her half was gone in 3 minutes. Mine, after politely posing for the camera was enjoyed slowly.
Juicy. Yummy. Bliss.
Happy Sunday people! :)

love, sniffles & kisses

So when I walked in the door last night, making it home a bunch earlier than my family expected, I was greeted by Elijah who ran up & hugged me yelling "you're home?!" When I told him I missed him he said he missed me first. Awwww... He didn't let go of me for awhile. Feels so good to be loved. :)
~Of course, it took awhile for everyone else to even notice I was there. lol They did ask if I had fun, which of course I did. It sounds like they did too. Two trips to Mcdonalds - one with their Aunt Kori on Friday (thanks for checking on them Kori!) & one with Vern yesterday. Elijah's cold is full-blown at this point. Poor baby. His little head is full of snot & he hasn't been sleeping well. Judging by the number of kisses he smothered me with I may end up in the same boat. :p It's okay - he's so worth it. :)
Kirsten & I went for a walk last night to get donuts for everyone & a pomegranate for ourselves. I love being outside while the sun sets, so I was being all sneaky when I planned our little outing. It was a pretty one. :) Oh, and the donuts were yummy too. I had a lemon filled one for dinner. Made up for that by sharing the pomegranate with K for breakfast this morning. :p Yum.
~Well, I hope you blog readers are having an awesome weekend. I would have loved to extend my little break from mommyhood & such, but it was so much fun while it lasted & I'm happy to be taking my turn with my sick little babe. Silly little boy wants more donuts. :p
Sorry for the lack of pics again. Will have to remedy that soon.
Smile! :)

Brrrrrr...

I wasn't expecting it to be so cold today. The sun's shining, the sky is a pretty blue & the wind is so crazy & cold. :p My kiddos & I donned our hoodies & headed bravely to the park, but once their little noses started turning red & getting runny we headed home.
I'm 30 weeks today! I have my appointment tomorrow morning & will finally hear the verdict on all of those blood tests. With the appointments being 2 weeks apart now & getting used to the thought of being in the third trimester I've been getting so excited to get things ready for little Maiah's arrival. Can't wait to hold her! I'm planning one last little outing with some friends to celebrate too. Have to have some fun before I'm at the very end & miserable and before she gets here and I become all absorbed in her sweet little babyness. :)
My kiddos & I have been on a fruit kick. We went through a big bag of apples in just a few days & I got a pomegranate the other day & have been craving 'em ever since. The fall weather has me thinking I need to make some apple crisp or something, but the only "baking" I've done of late was making some no-bake cookies with my kiddos last night. Chocolate, peanut butter & oats -can't go wrong there. Mmmm... They're all gone and nobody felt like they got enough. :p Just need to get some more cocoa powder & we'll be able to make some more. (Oh and I need AmyB's version of the recipe back. :p I winged it last night with amounts of ingredients & got lucky - it worked but loved having her version on hand since they were always perfect.)
Well, my house will smell nice regardless. I'm making Vern his roast. I still say a pomegranate sounds good. And maybe some taco bell bean burrito goodness. Oh wait, no - taco time has had commercials for their new navajo tacos. Now those look yummy. Sounds good to me. :p
I should finish folding the laundry & get back into PS. I'm almost done. Yay! :)
Happy Tuesday blog readers!

Happy Friday! :)

Hey hey and a happy Friday to all!
We're having some nice 70 degree weather & my kiddos are itching for a walk to the park. I'm hoping some fresh air will wake me up. I've been so very sleepy lately. I keep crashing way before I want to at night & I still feel zombaliscious the next day. :p I did spend the morning working on proofs & will hopefully feel more energized and work even faster when we get back. *crosses fingers*

Before we head out I wanted to share my current favorite commercial. Makes me smile every time. :) So does this shot of Ej & his cousin Abby. Such cuteness.
Have a great weekend! :)

Off Track

~My kiddos are all home from school for the rest of the week. Brandon has a 5 day weekend & Kirsten & LV are off track for a few weeks. I celebrated by sleeping in. ;)
~~So the big patch in anticipation of WoW's WoTLK expansion went live on Tuesday. After a rocky start Leilah still has no mounts... :( it's up and running. I'm liking the changes & am happy to see my friends and favorite gamers excited & logging in. It's kinda fun stuff all around. :)~Maiah has been crazy active lately. She must be trying to grow or something because I've been just constantly sooo hungry and sleeping more. :p
~~For those who have asked, I have no clue how I did on the gest. diabetes testing. We still (it's been months) have no phone. :p I see my doctor next week & he'll let me know then I guess. Hopefully our home phone number will work again some day. Life is just a little more stressful without one.
~Well, happy Thursday blog readers! I'm off to get ready for the day. Kirsten & I are thinking it looks like nice walking weather. :)

Happy Monday!

It was a crazy sort of weekend.

Thanks to Nina for the much nicer couches that are now sitting in my front room, to Lauren & Ty who helped us haul stuff and are just always fun to have around, to my family who helped me clean like crazy (notably Kirsten and Brandon who lent muscles and cleaning power to some of the stuff I wanted done) and to tylenol, which made it so I could eventually move around today. I'm so sore & have a headache again, but that has become normal.Oh, and it's so cold again - the high today is supposed to be 45 with more chances of snow?! None of it that we've seen has stuck so far, but yeah - the season has definitely changed on us. Brrrrr... It's supposed to be back up to 65 by Wednesday which is much more autumn-like in my book. It's not quite time for winter yet. Our trees still have leaves and everything. :p

Well I'm of to find some food & switch some laundry. Hope you blog readers have an awesome Monday! :)

late again

...so yesterday was mine & Vern's 12th anniversary. I had planned to post an entry and somehow didn't. :p Vern spent most of his day at work & I spent a chunk of my morning at the hospital doing my glucose tolerance test. Fun stuff. :p Four hours, 10 vials of blood and a bunch of Thomas stickers later (The techs at the lab loved Elijah - he did so awesome being stuck there with me all morning) I came home to spend the rest of the day trying to get rid of the shakies & a monster headache. I did make it to the mc run. Still no binding for Lore. :(
I crashed early and am happy to report that the headache is finally gone. :) So yeah... that was our big day. 12 years! I was hoping to have a video clip from our reception, but we haven't figured out how to change the format so that I can. I don't think I have any pictures scanned from our wedding day either. How sad is that. :p Just picture us younger, blonder & thinner... lol yeah.

Well, that's about as long as I can stand to sit here for the moment. My hips are acting up again. :p Hope you blog readers have an awesome day! :)

catching up...

Ahhhh it's been days again. I really don't mean to be such a slacker about blogging.
I've been so much sleepier of late, still have the sniffles & am trying to learn to manage the crazy little pains & stuff that go with being so very pregnant. I have an appointment with my dr. tomorrow, hopefully all goes well there. I have to do the 3 hour glucose stuff - I'm sure we'll be making that appointment with the lab tomorrow. I'm 28 weeks today. Third trimester! Yay! :)Elijah's so awesome & interested in my belly & in Maiah. He talks to her & hugs us all the time, and walks around calling her "baby Maiah Joy in mommy's tummy" - it's absolutely adorable.

Oh & I haven't thanked Nina here yet for the little weekend getaway. It was so nice to have a bit of a break, and the whirpool was wonderful. I need me one of those. :) We were close enough to check in with our kiddos & stuff, but we had someone else making our bed & bringing us new towels. Worked nicely. :)
Here's a quick screen of the mc run we made it to for Lore. (He's the jumping tauren. ;) Everyone else is kinda jumbled & I didn't take the time to get rid of names 'n stuff to make it all pretty. :p Still had to share the 'we did it" screenshot. :) Go us!)
On Friday Vern & I went up to the factory outlet mall in Park City. I got me some comfy jeans (was hoping to find some that fit under the belly instead of having the panel, but it didn't happen.) Motherhood has some seriously comfy stuff going on though with their secret fit belly. (If your pregnant, need jeans and want comfort these work great.) The whole panel thing has just always looked funny to me. Not like anyone will see it under my shirt anyway. And they'll stretch as big as Maiah wants 'em to and are oh so comfy. :p Might look less wonky if the panel matched the jeans or something, but I only saw the wanna-be nude version. Still, once the panel's all covered with a cami & shirt they get a thumbs up from me. :) (Oh, and I've gotta say that seeing the pregnant models with the little hunks on their hips made me feel better. lol I'm normal - yay!! Doesn't make me like them any better, but at least all of the models had 'em too. :p)

Well, that's kinda my update for now. I really need to be working after being gone all weekend & being soooo sleepy yesterday, so off I go.

Have a great day!

:o)

Happy Friday blog readers!
I've been trying to work all week. (It's gone oh so slowly with a cuddly sick babe & my own stuffy cold along with homework distractions and such. :p) At the beginning of the week I thought I'd be finishing up by now, then my week happened. It didn't go as planned. The end is in sight - just need to be able to spend a chunk of time at my computer, which hasn't been happening enough. This weekend isn't gonna be it either. Vern & I are going on a little anniversary getaway tonight & tomorrow night. (Our anniversary is on the 9th. 12 years! o.O) We'll be checking in with the kiddos tomorrow & staying home long enough to help a friend with something. (Yeah, we love him just that much.)

I figured I'd share a couple pics that made me smile while I worked yesterday. My niece Morgan is just so cute. I loved grabbing shots of her that day. :)


Have a great weekend people! :)

2 entries in 1 day?!

Crazy, I know. But I got my weekly pregnancy newsletter in my inbox & thought I'd share where I'm kinda at right now. It's been awhile. :)
27 weeks
Considering I felt like I looked kinda puffy in some recent pictures & can so relate to the aches and pains type stuff I guess I'm right on target. I haven't been friends with my scale in awhile, but we'll see how I've been doing on the 8th, at my next appointment. (I'll also get to schedule the 3 hour glucose stuff with the lab. Pokey pokey pokey... Yay?! :p)
Hopefully just because I feel like I'm growing overly humungous doesn't mean that I actually am. :p I'll be watching the puffy/swelling thing & the weight gain closely though.

Back to helping with some 6th grade homework. There's been a LOT of it lately. :p
Happy Tuesday evening! :)

owies, sunburns 'n snifflies.

I think I can safely say that I've learned the hard way to stay away from frying pans while pregnant. :p This latest burn is from making grilled cheese sandwiches the other day. It goes nicely with the 3 I got recently while making sausage. :p This one's still blistering days later though, and still kinda hurts. Bummer.

My kiddos & I have been enjoying the weather lately, snifflies and all. We even went back to that park this Sunday. We came home a little sunburnt & tired, but it's been a fun way to spend our Sunday afternoons.

Happy Saturday!

I actually slept last night, without ever waking up in pain. Yay! I even slept in a little this morning. My favorite. :) It's all sunny out today & my kiddos are asking if we can walk to that park we went to last weekend. I just might take 'em. :) To add to the goodness I have some old No Doubt going while I sit here. Gogo Bathwater!

I wanna be quick with this entry, since there's lots I need to get done today. Meme time!
Some smiles for Saturday:

It's a beautiful day. :)
Elijah kissed me first thing this morning. :)
I have cinnamon almonds. Yum. :)
Vern actually doesn't have to work today. Means we can get more stuff done. :)
Kirsten's reading to Elijah right now. :)
My bedding is in the wash. I so love crawling into a fresh, clean bed. :)
LV's cleaning up the toy room like a good boy. It so needed it. :p
I might be able to catch Jason on vent today. He always makes me smile. :)
Brandon greeted me with a neck rub & scratched my back for me as he walked by my desk. :)
I think OC has a raid scheduled for tonight. Hope it happens. :)
It's Richard's 21st birthday! Hope it's awesome! :)
I'm not in pain anywhere at the moment. Yay! (I'm not tired either. Very cool.)


All good reasons to smile.
I hope you blog readers are all smiling too! Have a great day. :)

owie

If I go MIA from my computer over the next day or so it's because I'm in some serious pain.
My hips have been bothering me throughout this pregnancy, and I've had some pretty bad moments/days - but this has been the worst day ever. I woke up in the middle of the night in "it hurts enough to cry" type pain, and haven't been comfortable since. It's like my left hip joint is all locked up & my left quad, hamstring & glutes are all screaming at me at the same time. It hurts to walk and to sit, so I've been laying on my right side in bed reading to Elijah most of the day. Hopefully at some point we'll get to have a nap, because I'm absolutely zombaliscious at the moment.

You know, I used to complain about the charlie horses I'd get in my calves when I was pregnant - but at least those subsided quickly after the initial agony. I'd take those any day over this. :p

It's sunny & it's Wednesday though. Sounds like a couple of good reasons to smile to me. :)
Have a great day!

a walk in the wind :)

We had a busy sort of weekend complete with homework, grocery shopping and just the usual stuff needing to get done. Yesterday was so beautiful out though - Kirsten, Elijah and I decided to go for a walk. The wind was crazy, but the temperature was perfect.We were gone for 3 hours, walking through the neighborhood up to the middle school & stopping at playgrounds along the way. We got a little lost, walked farther than we meant to & came home kinda sore but we had a blast. :)
I'd planned to do a meme over the weekend but think I'll save it for another day. Back to work for me!
Have a great day. :)

what he said

...yeah, it's so totally nap time.

'night :)

still here :)

Life is just quiet with most of my kiddos at school, Vern working crazy hours and me still working & trying to keep Elijah from being too bored all day. Does it look like I'm succeeding? lol

Have a great day! :)

weekend by numbers

My kiddos gave me 100s of kisses today. Yay!
Vern came home Friday and collapsed after his 58 hour workweek. Poor guy.
I pulled 1 white hair out of my head today. That was not a happy little find. lol
Friday was my brother's 35^th birthday. Hope it was an awesome one Aaron!
Brandon was 5 hours late getting home from his friend's house today. Vern was spitting mad. I was relieved that he was mostly okay. (He biffed it bad on a bike and his elbow, wrists, knuckles & a knee are all really owie looking. I'll be watching his wounds closely – some of 'em were pretty bad.)
Maiah's big enough now that my 3 youngest kiddos had fun the other day watching my stomach move while she was kicking & stuff. She's fun to watch. :)
Vern took his blood pressure while we were out grocery shopping today. It was 140 over 77. Not good.
I thought that candy corn sounded yummy - my kiddos were eating 'em and they smelled so good. I had 5 and the amount of sugar made me feel sick. :p
I played AoC for a bit last night and Arinne hit level 47. Yay!
It's after 2 am. I should get some sleep – we're headed up to Logan tomorrow for some family fun. :)

'Night blog readers!

10 words

This is an easy one. You - the first 10 words that come to mind.

hola :)

Haha! I'm going to beat the 4-day mark this time. :)

Tomorrow's going to be a busy day. I have my 24 week appointment and lots of other stuff to do, so I thought I'd better check in tonight. :) It's almost time for my glucose test. :p He plans to skip the initial little screening test since I tend to fail those anyway. I really hope I've managed to keep things under control this time. I dislike my little finger-pokey-thingee and that final rule that says I have to be strictly on the diet to keep things under control. I'm really really really hoping that my own version of behaving has been enough.
Maiah has been growing and is so active of late. She likes to get all crazy right as I'm trying to go to sleep. Elijah loves to cuddle with me at night too - his favorite thing is to face me, throw his arm around my neck and his leg over my belly. Maiah seems to like it too - she kicks & pokes and seems to love that little hello.

Well, I was going to pull a late night of work until I realized I have to be up early for my appointment, so off I go to find my pillow.

'night blog readers. :)

this and that

Found: My mp3 player! Yay!
Bought: Um what have I bought lately? Groceries. And um, a birthday present for one of Kirsten's friends. She went to a rock star makeover birthday party on Saturday. Sadly, I got home so late last night when her makeup had worn off and such, I have no pictures. :(
Felt: Pain. :( My hips have been so owie lately. I wake up in pain when I have to roll over at night. It goes something like this. ~Lift myself a little in order to be able to roll over, *insert swear word here*, *insert swear word here*, *insert swear word here* ...gently flop onto the other hip & try to resume sleeping. :p The only time it hurts more is when I first wake up in the morning and have to try to get out of bed. lol So not fun.
Watched: Brandon tickle Elijah just now. The sunset last night in Idaho. Some random movie Vern bought. Um, it was called Accepted. He's liking having the laptop to watch movies at night.
Thought: Lots of yummy thoughts while I closed my eyes during the drive yesterday. I'm such a daydreamer and that's a long, uneventful drive. :p
Ate: Um I've had carrots, grapes & a piece of bread with pb on it so far today. Craving Chinese food. Rice noodles with beef please. Mmmmm...
Listened: To country music mostly while we drove. Not my usual thing by a long shot, but I like it better than lots of what Vern listens to so it works as a compromise. Toby Keith's Rock You Baby has some seriously yummy lyrics. Go Toby!
Rock you Baby chorus:
I'm gonna rock you baby to sleep
I'm gonna make you crazy over me
I'm gonna hold you like you've never been held before
And love you till you tell me you can't love anymore
I'm gonna shake your emotion right down to your soul
And then I'm gonna love you all over in and out of control
If this is how love is supposed to feel
baby I know I've fallen head over heels
I'm gonna rock you baby
Played: Um, can't say I've played much of anything lately. I'm slacking both in WoW and in AoC. Sadness. :(
Enjoyed: A peach/mango fusion crystal light slurpee yesterday. Mmmmm...
Planned: A birthday party for Grandpa Kent this evening at 6. Family, ice cream & fresh air. :)
Cheered: At Brian, who's calling his big bro Vern once a week to bug him about writing the letter that is the last thing needed to get things moving again for Brandon's and my immigration stuff. Love you Brian – thank you! :)
Cried: Last night. The usual really. I just don't understand what stops Vern from being willing to finish the immigration stuff for us. Our 12^th anniversary is in October, I'm carrying our 4^th child together. Yet he just won't do the one part that was his responsibility. When I ask him why doing this stuff is so low on his list of priorities I get the same blank stare he's given me all along. I just don't get it and he's just not discussing it. Or doing it. :(
Laughed: A little bit during that Accepted movie. And while having dinner with Lauren, Tyler & his family last night. They're fun. :)
Loved: My comfy bed this morning, sleeping in, cuddling with Elijah & talking to Kirsten. It was a wonderfully slow start to what promises to be a good day. :)

Well, Kirsten & I were wanting to go for a walk before that birthday party so I'd better get going.

Happy Sunday blog readers!